Game Day Blog -2/09 - Need a Good Laugh?

"Well-timed silence hath more eloquence than speech."

Martin Fraquhar Tupper

"Better to keep your mouth closed and be thought a fool than to open it and remove all doubt"

Mark Twain

"....adding a little humor seasoning to a presentation can add a little zest here and a little zip there. Incorporating humor into a presentation doesn’t mean you take the
topic or audience lightly, on the contrary, it means you know enough about effective communications and your respect to the audience enough to want to give them."

Mike Kerr

Are you a naturally funny guy?? If so, good for you. If not, always keep a bunch of "well-timed" one-liners in your pocket for times during a game where humor can diffuse a situation (WARNING: If this is not natural for you, and you don't practice this, it won't land and you will look like you are not serious about the game).

Last night's action (or inaction in some cases) brought about theses lines:

"The Steve Tatro-Is-That-A-Goal Line"

Situation: Goalie makes a great save on a scramble in front of the net. The defensemen are all congratulating him on what a great save, etc. You come flying in and ask incredulously, "Did that go in?!?!?" When everyone snaps at you, "No, No, it wasn't in!!!," you just smile and say, "Whew, good...we got it right," of course with a smile.

"The Pushing-Shoving after the Whistle In Front of the Net Line"

Situation: Players are bushing, bumping chests, being a bit rowdy. You come flying in and say, "Hey, hey...let's just have a push up contest to see who's toughest." When they look at you like you're on drugs, simply ask, "Well, how about a spelling contest?" Of course, do it with a smile.

I also had two different players who knocked down my partners and caused them to fall, go over and say they were sorry, or they just might get a penalty later on. Of course, with a smile...

Funny in Any Language:

Game Day Blog - 2/05 - Shoot You with a Rubber Bullet

What is the number one difference between a "cagey veteran" and aguy who is a bit on the "green side"? Veterans don't fall asleep, and green horns will pick a time to unfortunately "doze off".

I remember it all too well. I was there. I used to do it, too. I remember a game in particular, Waterloo at Green Bay in the USHL at the old Brown County Coliseum (what a dump), and I dozed off in what was turning into a routine game and routine rout for Waterloo. I doze off and all of a sudden I have missed a major stick violation, there is a fight on the ice, and I am not sure how it all started. WHAT IN THE HECK WAS I THINKING?!? I wasn't...it seems to happen.

That's where the rubber bullet comes in...

The Secret Service train their agents to react to situations in a calm, cool, collected way AFTER they have been shot. In their training, they will unexpectedly shoot them with a rubber bullet, measure their heart rate, and observe their response and reactions. After all, these are people who sign up to "take a bullet for the President". They'd better be able to be level-headed when they get shot.

This practice will continue until their heart rate stays at a low rate, because you think better with a lower heart rate as opposed to a heart that is racing.

In other words, they want their field agents used to the feeling of being shot.

Maybe we should shoot inexperienced officials with rubber bullets to help them speed up the learning curve, and get them to STOP FALLING ASLEEP AT IN-OPPORTUNE TIMES.

On the this night, working a high school game, I saw the partner's I was with fall asleep. Things happened, and they missed it. I could chalk it up as "it's part of the learning process" or I could give them advice to help eliminate that from happening again.

Do you want REAL SPECIFIC advice to avoid "falling asleep" in a game? Contact me at:

info@ultimateofficials.com

Game Day Blog - 02/07 -- Loose lips sink ships

I was thinking about "teacheable moments" from games I work and decided that I would blog on topics that come up during those games. I am not necessarily going to go into situations specifically, but instead cover some of the more subtleties and nuances of the game.

Since I have had this idea to do game day blogs, I have worked three games myself - one high school and two junior games. I do have moments from each that I want to talk about, but I wanted to cover the most glaring first...Saturday's MJHL game.

This teachable moment had NOTHING to do with the game itself. It had to do with a conversation I had prior to the game. There are many moments were I almost crap myself in response to stuff guys say...




Here's a fill-in-the-blank scenario:

Person A (who is a person of influence):

I have been really impressed with the job that ___John Doe___ is doing. It seems like they are really active and been doing a good job helping others.

Person B (who talks when they should listen):

I don't like ___John Doe___.

Conclusion: Why would person B say that? You would be amazed how much trouble guys get into with their mouths. The officiating world is small. Real small. When others start lip-jacking about some official, and what type of job they do, and why in the he** do they get the assignments they do, and blah-blah-blah...and they want you to participate in the conversation. Keep your head down and your mouth shut. Period.

The guy who said this (the Person B {who talks when they should listen}), has heard the keep your mouth shut talk before. Some guys just don't get it.